Why do all the good looking people become celibate?

Wait, allow me to rephrase: why is it that, of all the people I’ve ever known to make a statement of celibacy, they’ve all been good looking? I mean, do you ever hear a really ugly person who never gets any action proclaim “That’s it, I’m becoming celibate!”?

NO, sir. It’s always the hotties who are beating back their fans with a stick who decide to deny the world access to their hotness and become celibate. I guess because celibacy implies there’s a choice being made, not just an inevitability. The lookers always have the opportunity to get some, but the less attractive don’t always have a choice, and there IS a difference between being celibate, and just not being able to get any.