Friend: You never call me anymore. You should call.
Me: Yeah, having a full time job for the first time in more than a year has definitely fucked with my time budgeting abilities.
Friend: Well, you should call me.
Me: Yeah, I should also finish that article I’ve been working on and clean my house and do the laundry and make it to the gym and—
Friend: No, you’re changing the subject. This isn’t about your articles. This is about ME! ME!!! And you should call ME, ME, ME!!!
Me: Uh, I was just trying to put it in perspective.
Friend: I know, but you should call me.