When my mother and I were driving into Los Angeles during her visit a few weeks ago, we passed through Van Nuys.
“My old friend Donny Becker was from Van Nuys!” mom crowed, and then told the story about how the summer of ‘69, which she spent as a Catholic girl working at a Jewish summer camp, changed her life. She’d gone to Catholic school for grades 1 through 12, I guess Camp Benbow was her first introduction to a group of people who liked to sit around, play guitars, hug each other, and sing.
In other words, it was at Camp Benbow that my mom first became a hippie. Her life would never be the same.
One of her fellow counselors was a guy named Donny Becker. He and my mom were quickly friends, and I guess he taught her the guitar chords to “Summertime.” My mother has been singing that song for as long as I can remember, and when she included it on her self-released CD, Tribal Call, she even dedicated it to “my Jewish friends at Camp Benbow.”
Mom, knowing what a massive geek adept internet researcher I am, asked my help in finding Donny Becker during her LA visit. We did a quick Google search and eventually found our way to this page.
My mother squinted at the photo. “Well, it could be him,” she said. “He did have curly hair…I mean, it’s just so hard to say! I haven’t seen him since he was 20 years old!” After reading the bio, she decided it was indeed the Donny Becker she knew: he went to Santa Cruz, and had worked with children since college. Plus, “best talent: giving hugs”? Come on! This had to be the guy.
An e-mail was sent, and eventually my mother was sitting in my living room, chatting on the phone with Donny Becker. They madly tried to catch up on the last 30 years, and at some point, Donny mentions his 20-something daughter, who’d just started a new African dance class.
“Oh, that’s funny,” my mom says. “I just went to an African dance class with my 20-something daughter this week.”
Do you see where this is going? Turns out that Donny Becker’s daughter is in my dance class. And that Donny Becker himself had been at that very dance class the week before my mother attended it with me.
Who knew!
Naturally, mom wanted me to introduce myself to Donny’s daughter. Weird thing is, I don’t know anyone’s name in that class. It’s not like we all sit around and say, “Hi, I’m Ariel. And I like to dance!” I spent the last couple classes trying to figure out which girl was Donny’s daughter.
“Did you meet Rachel yet?” my mom asked me the last time I talked to her.
“No, mom. I can’t figure out which one she is…and what am I supposed to say?! ‘Hi, our parents were friends in the late ’60s?’”
Well, last night I finally figured out which one she was.
“Are you Rachel?” I hazarded, in-between crossing the floor doing our chest pumps and hip gyrations.
“Ah-HA!” she said. “You must be my dad’s friend’s daughter! He’s been asking me constantly if I’d met you yet. I kept being like, ‘Dad! What am I supposed to say to the girl?”
HA!
Hey there. I'm Ariel Meadow Stallings, a native Seattleite who's written my way up and down the Left Coast. Electrolicious is where I post daily randomata, but I also write for a living. My first book, Offbeat Bride, was published last year.
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jesse
November 21st, 2002 at 10:13 am
wow, that certainly wins for the coolest internet-meeting-oldfriend-finding story ever.
philippe
November 21st, 2002 at 10:16 am
Nice story !
Did the both of you manage to start a conversation after such a promising start ? Or did it turn out in ‘hum, well, got to go now ?
Ariel
November 21st, 2002 at 10:18 am
We didn’t have much time to chat at that point, because it was the middle of class…but after class we chatted for a bit. She seemed cool!
erica
November 21st, 2002 at 10:22 am
that is an excellent story! made my afternoon. gotta love googling huh?
leblanc
November 21st, 2002 at 10:23 am
that’s incredible!! small world. and every time i hear the name “Van Nuys”, i think about my old pen pal Claudia from the 6th grade…. i think we wrote 2 or 3 letters. i wonder if she remembers me (or my class) from Michigan and our pen pal exchange…..
jonah
November 21st, 2002 at 11:30 am
great story, bizarre how small this world is (and how true that cliche is)
tlc
November 21st, 2002 at 12:18 pm
i LOVE when that freaky weird shit happens. you know what’s also funny is that my mom’s first ever jewish acquaintance who was her first roommate in college and who turned out to be her friend was also from van nuys.
Philos
November 21st, 2002 at 1:09 pm
That’s a great story. The ending made me smile.
Echo
November 21st, 2002 at 1:36 pm
Awesome story Air! I love it!
Ariel's Mom
November 21st, 2002 at 2:01 pm
I’m glad you finally made the connection with Donny’s daughter and she seemed “cool.” –but of course! Thanks for telling the story in such an amusing way. It’s all true Folks (well, most of it anyway. I did NOT attend boarding school for all my school years–just for four.) The Jewish community clearly has it over the catholics for loving, authentic connections. .. At least from MY experience!
laura
November 21st, 2002 at 2:14 pm
i can’t believe no one’s mentioned that your mom knows the dude from parachute express! that’s like knowing one of the wiggles.
my niece will be very impressed.
helenjane
November 21st, 2002 at 2:19 pm
I hope to be in the LA area for January-March…
think we might be able to have a chance encounter?
Ariel
November 21st, 2002 at 4:09 pm
Mom: oops! I’ll fix that.
HJ: of course!
Chantelle
November 22nd, 2002 at 6:13 am
OK, maybe you’ve already been told this thirty times…but I can’t hold back…one more time can’t hurt…it’s just begging for it…What a great story!
ericalynn
November 22nd, 2002 at 10:18 am
that’s great!
a few years ago i called Dell to order a new computer online and the salesperson who i dealt with turned out to be my old friend from childhood
what are the odds?
Rick
November 1st, 2005 at 7:59 pm
I was reminiscing about Camp Benbow tonight so searched Google and found your narrative. I was there as a camper in ‘69 (10 years old)and had a great time. I remember singing ‘Summertime’ many times around the campfire, probably along with Donny and your Mom. Great memories.