Sunday afternoon we returned to Missoula for Andreas’ step-brother Chris’ law school graduation party. I spent most of the gathering under meddling duress from Dre’s family friends regarding Andreas’ and my hypothetical wedding plans. Somehow, the fact that we’re committed and yet the wedding is not yet a reality is really bothering some people. I think I made the mistake of saying that we’re not all opposed to getting married, and indeed plan to do it at some point, but that it’s an issue of money. As Helen Jane can tell you, weddings are way too damn expensive, and as anyone can tell you, it sucks to put yourself in debt to pay for a party that stresses you out — a party, I might add, that’s SUPPOSED to be a celebration of your relationship. I offered this explanation as a way of getting people off my back (I also produced my copy of Unmarried to Each Other for the same reason), but somehow that just gave the assaulters more to work with … so much so that they’re offering to pay for the whole thing, plan the whole thing, etc etc. I do believe it was all drunken heckling and banter, but by the end of the evening, I felt like I’d been beaten over the head with something white, bowed, and reeking of frilliness.

Don’t get me wrong: I’d love to get married! But dear god. What a fiasco Sunday was. Perhaps the high moment of the whole day was this:

Family friend, trying to explain why she’s so desperate for a wedding to plan: You don’t understand, Ariel: some of us are old and married and don’t have anything to look forward to anymore!

Me: Why do you think we’re not married yet?!

You would think that with a snappy comeback like that, I would have earned a few minutes of rest, but you would think wrong. Dre’s avowedly carniverous step-mother offered to coordinate the vegan buffet. A wedding dress would be made for me, free of charge! The Galaxy Girls’ tickets to fly up from San Francisco and performance space would all be taken care of! Char’s husband Allen would be more than happy to wear a gold evening gown and perform with them! No, really! It was almost tempting, although I think that even the most excited and meddlesome of family friends would balk if we actually took them up on their offer. Although I almost wanted to, just out of spite. Or something.

Yesterday we hooped in the morning, and Andreas quite painfully pulled his hamstring while demonstrating hoop racing. Hilarity ensued, but Andreas is still limping today. We spent the day yesterday with Nancy and Susan, touring Missoula’s excellent vegetarian Indian restaurants, indie record stores, and excellent book shops. I’m thoroughly sucked into a book called Tipping The Velvet that Nancy bought for me yesterday.

It was nice, having layovers in Seattle. Just flying in and out of the city, admiring the sun glinting off the Sound and the rounded green protrusions of the islands, makes my soul sing. When we descended into Los Angeles at 10pm last night, the vast grid of orange street lights stretching beneath us from the hills to the sea to the desert to everywhere, I thought to myself,

“Jesus, I hate this town.”