Remember this post? Well, a year and a half has passed, and I need to update.

Here are four more things I’m tired of seeing on blogs. Same disclaimer as last time: don’t go getting all offended if you’re guilty of one of the peeves listed below. Rather, just think about how much happier your readers would be (ok: how much happier I would be) if you did a little switcharoo.

1. Bloggers who get published elsewhere and abandon their blogs
I know that it’s exciting that your writing is getting published, but I wish it didn’t mean the end of your witty takes on daily life. Being published is a crap excuse for not blogging. Look at me! I’ve been writing AND blogging for years. Just because you get your words in print doesn’t mean you can abandon your faithful readers! WE MADE YOU! If you can’t do both, at least do us all the favor of replacing your blog with a simple portfolio. It’ll clear up a lot of confusion.

2. “Letter to an inanimate object” Posts
Here’s an example of what I mean:

Dear Last Night’s Diarrhea Attack,
Next time, please warn me first.

Thanks,
Your friend Ariel

This technique was moderately funny the first dozen or so times, but its punch has been negated by gross overuse. It’s become a tired little tool, and should be left to rust out in the shed.

3. Cooking posts with no recipes
If you’re going to go on and on about how you made that amazing glazed pear dish with the orange/mango/lentil chutney on the side, the least you can do is give us the recipe. Otherwise, it just sort of sounds like bragging. Sorry.

4. Lack of paragraph breaks
Long posts need ample paragraph breaks. Especially with copy on the web, if it’s more than about ten lines of text, eyes glaze over. I think technically, it’s suppoesd to be even less than that, but I’m forgiving…until it gets to a whole screen that’s a solid block of text and I can’t focus on it.

Runners up:
• Periods. After. Each. Word.
• Unfinished stories
• Excessive provincialism

That said, I’m keeping my eyes open for some new daily reading. Funny as hell? Twisted? Frequently updated? Remarkably written? Easy-to-read layout? Hilarious baby stories? Clue me in, people.