Do you have any idea how hard it is to make a wedding registry when you’ve been living together for six years? In many ways, registries only make sense for very young couples or those who go straight from living with their parents to living with a spouse.
Dre and I did our registry at Amazon, in part because the company has paid our bills since 2000, and in part because they have a really wide diversity of products to choose from. Oh, and also because I’m a web geek and for godsake, where else would I register?
But it was like pulling teeth out to put things on the registry. It took us ages to find the $7 vegan cookbooks and who knows about the knife set. We’ve got martini glasses from Finland and a subscription for “fruits of the month” gift baskets (er, the gift that keeps on giving?). We’ve got the Wandering Chicken of Pistoulet and a cheese grater and a robotic vacuum cleaner. Each of these things felt silly to add to the registry, because none of them are anything we need. We have everything we need. It’s hard to pick out gifts that we, as a couple, want. I have lots of things that I want for ME, but is it really right to have a My Little Pony on the wedding registry?
Stranger still is that a couple guests have called to say, “I don’t want to get you something boring off your registry — what do you really want.” What I really want is a handcrafted running table custom-made by my mother in law, but I already got that. What I really want is a night of sleep where I don’t wake up before dawn and start mentally running through my to-do list. What I really want is all our friends and family in one place at the same time, but that’s already in the mail. What else could we really want?
Hey there. I'm Ariel Meadow Stallings, a native Seattleite who's written my way up and down the Left Coast. Electrolicious is where I post daily randomata, but I also write for a living. My first book, Offbeat Bride, was published last year.
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bdo
July 30th, 2004 at 8:21 pm
stop stealing my memories!
my wife and i dated for 9.5 years before we finally got married. we were going to bail on the whole registry thing, but then we realized that people would buy us gifts regardless. it might as well be something we can use.
Matt
July 31st, 2004 at 11:34 am
Do I have to get married so people will buy me loads of fun stuff? Because I really don’t think I’m gonna end up getting married. If that was in the cards I would have done it 10-15 years ago.
Letme offer my congrats to you two - it sounds great and it’s gonna be fantastic! Can’t wait to read the report and have a little sniffle to myself, because I’m dead soppy.
aanneb
August 1st, 2004 at 7:09 pm
Heifer International doesn’t have a registry, but perhaps you could ask for flocks of chicks or a gaggle of geese, or even some bunnies or a llama…. It’s my favorite gift to friends. http://catalog.heifer.org/
katiemagic
April 14th, 2005 at 1:06 pm
OK, I realize I’m a little behind the post here but I had to add. My husband and I decided that we would not register because we had everything we needed (after living together) and people would be coming in from all over to attend our wedding which was just a big party anyway and all that travel can get expensive. You would not believe the amount SHIT PEOPLE GAVE US FOR NOT REGISTERING. And I mean verbally, not physical gifts. My mother who is normally the most understanding supportive person in my life was badgering me EVERY DAY to register for something. No one could understand why we didn’t want gifts. DROVE ME NUTS.