Daily affirmations of a word mercenary
Today I received a phone call from a man looking for an escort. This is actually the third time this has happened in recent months, but the first time that I actually took the call and didn’t just laugh at a voicemail.
It was very confusing. The guy told me he was interested in my “services,” to which I replied that he had the wrong number. He asked if he’d dialed the digits he meant to, which he had. That was my phone number. He then asked if he’d reached Electrolicious, which of course he had. I have a business license under the name Electrolicious (makes it easier to file my taxes for my freelance work, bla bla bla), and I made the mistake of listing my cell number as my business number. I’ve gotten telemarketer calls for Electrolicious, but never someone looking for an Electrolicious escort.
Once we’d determined that he’d reached Electrolicious and that this was indeed my phone number, he wouldn’t give up. “I’m really interested in your services!” he insisted.
“Dude, I’m a copywriter,” I said.
“Ooh,” he replied flirtatiously. “You mean you read books and stuff?”
I was like, “No. I write business copy for companies and websites.”
He was like, “Are you suuuuure?”
I was like, “Yes, I’m sure. In fact, where did you get this number?” He said he’d found it in the phone book. WTF? My number isn’t in the phone book.
Then asked if he could give me his cell number, so that I could perhaps call him back “later.” You know, later. At that point, I got sick of playing and just said NO and hung up.
Now, however, I’m sort of confused. How is my number and business name somehow being circulated as an escort service? And why couldn’t this guy take no for an answer? It’s like he thought I was playing some escort role-playing game where-in I pretend to be an irritated dotcom worker dismissing him on the phone. Is that game fun or sexy in any way? WTF?!
Hey there. I'm Ariel Meadow Stallings, a native Seattleite who's written my way up and down the Left Coast. Electrolicious is where I post daily randomata, but I also write for a living. My first book, Offbeat Bride, was published last year.
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amy
October 2nd, 2006 at 3:41 pm
Google electrolicious + your phone number and see what comes up? That is pretty creepy, esp. that it has happened more than once.
lily
October 2nd, 2006 at 7:35 pm
i was in such a mood today, you should’ve given ME his number. i would’ve tracked him down AND THEN KICKED HIS ASS.
heidi janet
October 2nd, 2006 at 8:42 pm
because men love to hear no for an answer honey. it’s YES that freaks them out.
bingo
October 3rd, 2006 at 10:17 am
It might be harassment from certain fundy christians. These people are like the mob.
Ariel v.
October 3rd, 2006 at 11:43 am
Yes, he did think you were playing with him. The audience for your average escort service? People who have already made a moral shift toward secrecy (99.9% of these guys are married) and smoke/mirrors re: intent (it’s a crime to ask for sex, but not a crime to ask for companionship). Also, escorts - the good ones - are expected to play hardball. It’s considered good screening practice.
I love stories of misplaced context, but EWWW. That musta sucked (after being funny for about a minute). Glad you hung up on him.
Ariel v.
October 3rd, 2006 at 11:46 am
Also, if he calls you again, call the cops immediately.
Tshirt folding expert - Electrolicious
July 13th, 2008 at 12:10 am
[...] next morning, I got a phone call from New York. Convinced it was yet another escort caller (I still get several late-night calls a week from horny men), I let the call go to [...]