Daily affirmations of a word mercenary
I’ve been getting emails all morning from folks wanting to know how Unplugged Night went, so here you go! This project is an invaluable exercise for me. Last night’s timing couldn’t have been worse, really: I spent most of the day yesterday at work counting down to launching a big project I’ve been working on for weeks, and at a certain point I realized it wasn’t going to happen before 5:30 … ie, the time I was getting home and unplugging. My last half-hour of connectivity was filled with this sense of crazed desperation — OMG! BUT HOW! I CAN’T! THIS IS INSANE!
But I took a deep breath and reminded myself that it could all wait. Launching at 9am Thursday vs. 7pm Wednesday was not going to make a drop of difference to anyone except for me. It was a self-set deadline with absolutely nothing relying on it. It’s funny how much I convince myself of the INCREDIBLE URGENCY of the most ridiculous things.
That hump overcome, I got home and started getting myself ready for the evening. Like any junkie itching for a fix, I had a couple rough moments. I went digging in our hallway closet and found a bunch of crap between me and my box of craft supplies. I mean sure: It was irritating. But not nearly as irritating as I was thinking it was. Why must these boxes be in my way? WHY CAN’T I JUST GO READ SOME RSS FEEDS?!
Deep breath. Tidying of kitchen. Deciding to get take-out. Walking. Laughing at huge-eared chihuahua pressing its nose against the window of a delivery truck. Home. Eating.
Then I dove into my first project: writing a letter to my dear friend Megan. When I announced the 52 Nights Unplugged project, Megan sent me the sweetest email reminding me of how the first five years of our friendship (’93-’98) we kept in touch mostly by handwritten letter, and specifically requesting that we try to get back to that.
I’ve actually been getting more into letter writing recently. I’ve always been a fan of thank you cards, but in the last couple months I’ve been sending more letters to friends and family as an extra special way of communicating. Plus, I like drawing and don’t have nearly enough excuses to do it.
Mid-letter writing, my friend Ben showed up. I’d sent a Twitter message out to my friends saying “Who’s in for Unplugged Night!?” which Ben took quite literally to mean “Who’s coming to my house and being unplugged with me?” It was a happy surprise to see him at the door, and so he came up and we visited a bit … having several moments of referencing things online, reaching for the laptop on the couch, and then saying “oops. no.”
Then we both sat down at the table and worked on letters and drawings. It was a great way to spend time with a friend.
Andreas got home from circus class around 9, and then it was time for tea and chatting. There was a certain point when I got a little pang of “What is it that I know is waiting for me? What’s that feeling of looking forward to something?” and realized it was my brain addictively spinning over the emails that I knew were sitting in my inbox. LITTLE PRESENTS! WAITING!
Ben headed home, and Andreas and I sat down for a rousing game of Cribbage. I learned how to play when he and I started dating, and I’m ashamed at how little I’ve improved in the 10 years since. That said, I managed to luck out and get a whole run of good hands, and ultimately kicked Dre’s butt winning the game and only gloating a little bit.
Then we were tired and went to bed.
So. That was the first Unplugged Night. It was relatively painless and gave me a lot of insight into how I run my life and the stories I tell myself about how URGENT and CRUCIAL my online communications are. Note to friends & family: you are not allowed to remind me of this. Only I am allowed to make jokes about my mother, and only I am allowed to critique my online tics.
Hey there. I'm Ariel Meadow Stallings, a native Seattleite who's written my way up and down the Left Coast. Electrolicious is where I post daily randomata, but I also write for a living. My first book, Offbeat Bride, is in bookstores now.
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ashbloem
January 31st, 2008 at 2:24 pm
That sounds like a wonderfully cozy evening. I hope it continues to prove a good experience, and maybe you’ll be, like, a Seattle cribbage CHAMPION by the end of the year.
Leif Hansen
January 31st, 2008 at 2:28 pm
Excellent! I love the details, honesty, and humor of your story Ariel….even better that at least one person showed up thinking it was a ‘open house’ unplugged night (maybe go with that…?)
Thanks for publicly sharing your goal and its outcomes, and as a result for adding to the ripple of people wanting to reclaim a little more sanity and humanity.
For those to whom my first post of thanks came too late, here it is at the end of the comments.
BTW, everyone: Hi. I’m Leif hansen. I’m one of the two facilitators of the Soul Tech event.
Elli
January 31st, 2008 at 2:41 pm
Ha! I love your caveat at the end and I can relate entirely. It is somehow not fair (though I can’t come up with a rational reason why not) that family and friends think that anything we write on our blogs is fair game to bring up in real life, especially when it’s self-critical. It’s a fuzzy line, I realize. Blogs are public by nature, and anything we write has been automatically stripped of its privacy. But, how do we deal when so much of our introspection and reflection happens in this public space?
Kindra
January 31st, 2008 at 3:15 pm
I love cribbage; I think it’s going extinct because there are so many flashy board games out there. My dad taught me to play in 2nd grade. He claims it was to teach to me to add quickly, but I think he just wanted a playing partner.
I love the idea of 52 unplugged nights – although I’m not sure I would be successful.
Elly
January 31st, 2008 at 8:51 pm
We’re gonna try Sunday as our all-day unplugged day. We’ll see how that goes.
Megan
January 31st, 2008 at 9:27 pm
Wow… proof that a letter has been written and quite possibly sent soon! I can hardly believe it. I’m going to start digging out all those old packets of cute japanese stationery and stickers in preparation to send one back. So funny how our initial bi-coastal correspondence spawned pre-email! YAY for real letters!
Meaghan
February 1st, 2008 at 6:22 am
When I’m at work I’m totally connected, but once I go home I stay unconnected. I love it. My friends and I play a lot of board games and card games now, and we always have a ridiculous amount of fun.
I suggest Phase 10, a card game I’m now addicted to.
wonton
February 1st, 2008 at 10:20 am
Phase 10 is a pretty cool game if you have patience and aren’t too aggressively competitive. But, for people like me, it coud easily cause an unwanted stabbing at what would have been a casual, fun evening. LOL I can’t stand to lose.
I know this is totally unrelated to this specific blog but I had to add–since Ariel works there– I just read that Microsoft is vying to buy Yahoo! for $44.6 billion smackers. WOW. Will this affect you in any way, Ariel?
Ariel
February 1st, 2008 at 11:21 am
Wonton, I’m not sure how it would affect me other than that I would get to be co-workers with some of my fave peeps at Yahoo.
yara
February 2nd, 2008 at 1:00 pm
b. and i play cribbage too. i bought “Play Cribbage to Win”, which is probably more an indicator of my competitive personality than reflective of any actual ability. the explanations of different strategic moves are really helpful to figuring out how i lost (again)!
Brodie
February 3rd, 2008 at 9:07 pm
There is like, some sort of irony in blogging about unplugged night. “Hey look I turned off my computer, and tehn turned it back on to write about how I turned it off!” - just sayin. I like the hat
Ariel
February 3rd, 2008 at 9:59 pm
Irony, Brodie? Gee, ya think!?
brodie
February 4th, 2008 at 3:50 pm
Rosie Perera
February 13th, 2008 at 7:02 pm
Speaking of irony, I wrote an article in which I suggested taking a “technology sabbath” periodically, and some wise-guy said (I’m paraphrasing, because I can’t find his blog comment anymore), “so, am I supposed to schedule my technology sabbath on my Palm Pilot?”